Anxious, really??

 "Are you anxious about anything"

NOW THAT'S A QUESTION THESE DAYS?"

"Only with the state of the world:

global pandemic, 

hateful politics, 

states on fire, 

back to back hurricanes,

lost my cat..."

So I answer: "not especially". 

This was one of the many questions asked me during my doctor appointment yesterday. Lucky me! I got to see both the nurse practitioner as well as our family physician. She (NP) asked him to come in after the exam, EKG, blood work, etc. And they agreed to give me a Rx to take at night to keep my bp and heart rate from spiking. And they also want me to be tested for sleep apnea.

So now we wait to see what the tests show. Guess they will take a week or so...

Told them that I wouldn't go to the ER last Friday when all this started  because I didn't think I was having a heart attack. (Luckily I was right) However I did tell DH that if I passed out at home, he could call 911.

Something strange is going on and it does involve my heart and bp, so it is scary. I don't want a repeat of these last 4 days.

It's Tuesday noon now and DH just went to pick up the Rx (it had to be ordered). Not feeling great this am... weak and a bit headachy... but no spike during the night last night so I was able to sleep. 

Drinking a little black Irish tea - in case I'm headachy missing the caffeine. 

My EKG  is always a bit strange and was again yesterday, but has been that way for years and was checked out by a Cardiologist about 5 years ago. At that time he said my heart was fine. But now if this Rx and/or sleep apnea test doesn't give results, they may send me back to a Cardiologist. Guess we'll see.

Oh, the fun and games of aging...

stranger things...

 2020 just keeps getting better, doesn't  it?  Besides the continuing saga of the Pandemic,  losing Ghost this week, the awful fires in California & Oregon, my cousin told me this morning about Tropical Storm Mary that may be developing into a hurricane and heading toward New Orleans. My good friend here in Texas just texted me that she  has a detached retina and just had emergency surgery, and I've been 'weird' for the last 3 nights...

I'll ask any of you if you are familiar with these symptoms. I have always suspected that I have sleep apnea - but ignored it. Over the years I have woken up with my heart pounding, headache, and bp high. But after I got up, walked around a bit, and had a cup of tea, it would all go away. (Normally my bp is low - about 120/70... sometimes as low as 105/59.)

But during these episodes my bp goes up to 170-199/100. It happens either late at night or early in the am, lasts for hours, and returns to normal sometime late morning. This has happened 3 nights now. Last night DH stayed up with me while I sat up on the sofa... heart pounding. 

My SIL is a nurse and she says it sounds more like nocturnal hypertension...??? Since I didn't go to sleep and the bp still rose, I'm thinking - maybe not sleep apnea? I've been told to go to the emergency room, but I'm trying to hold out to see my doctor Monday and have him or his nurse practitioner  listen to my heart and bp... and possibly tell me what's going on. 

This world is turning into a strange place...

Sorry this wasn't an uplifting post. I'll try to do better next time.

Hugs,

Rian

 

sad day...

For those of you that don't know, Ghost is our 15 year old Russian Blue (well, not a pedigreed Russian Blue - but from her appearance definitely has some in her).  She was dropped on our back porch as a kitten about 5 weeks old. Her mother and sibling left her and more than likely knew there was something 'not right' about her. 

The Vets told us that they thought she had diabetes insipidus as well as genetic kidney problems, and possibly some neurological issues. They didn't give her a good prognosis. Told us that they would be surprised if she made it to her first birthday. 

Well, we kept her on KD (Rx Kidney diet) and over the years she has had some 'issues' that had to be taken care of, but in general she survived much better than anyone expected. She has always drank an enormous amount of water and passed huge quantities of urine. She also has a strange anatomy... in that she is very wide across the shoulders and walks with a bit of a bowlegged front. 

We've never been sure if she sees well as she has developed this habit of coming to us when we wag our hands at her. And she has never tried to climb or swat at things like other cats do. She does hear - as loud noises (like thunder) frighten her... and she's never been a lap cat but loves brushing and petting. All in all, she has been a sweet (albeit a bit odd) member of our family for 15 years.

But this weekend she seems to be failing. We will bring her to the Vet ASAP and see what is going on. But more than likely she is in kidney failure (with her age and underlying genetic conditions). We are bracing ourselves for this diagnosis as we have seen the signs too often lately. After losing both Tux and Julie last December and January, the end signs are not hard to read. I guess we should be happy that we had her this long... and we are. 

But still... 

Hugs (virtual),

Rian

it's cooler now... and other things

Sitting here at my laptop with my Dunkin Donut Mocha coffee thinking about what to post about today. With this 'sheltering at home' - there's not a lot of 'new' going on.

I'm sure summer isn't over here in Texas, but this week we're cooler... in the 70's in the mornings, going into the 80's in the afternoon and evenings. And we also have rain! Makes for a nice break. 

Other things:

Finished "The 5th Wave" and decided to try to finish "Educated"... which I read part of a while back and lost interest. It's a very 'strange' story. Continuing it last night only confirms this belief. But I will keep reading. 

Has anyone out there read "The Reckoning" by John Grisham? Finished that not too long ago too and was very disappointed at the ending. Anyone else feel that way?

My favorite books are Irish trilogies, home-town cozies (like Jan Karon's), cozy themed mysteries, and some historical fiction (Lady of Hay by Barbara Erskine and Galway Bay by Mary Pat Kelly). But if push comes to shove, I will read almost anything.

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A change of subject

I like rocks...

I have 2 favorites: this green and this flat black

I have no idea where the green one came from - but it feels so wonderful to rub my fingers across

and the flat black one I found on a beach on the Dingle Peninsula in Ireland:

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Question: Has anyone ever looked up the old house they grew up in? I'm sure many of you have.  I recently did this and was astonished that it was still around... and had been re-structured as such.

It was a a small house right off of Canal Street in New Orleans. It had a ceiling fan and a floor heater and one of those 'in the wall' gas heaters in the one bathroom. It wasn't shotgun, like many - but more of a double shotgun... with front room, dining room, and kitchen all following each other on the left... then a bedroom, bath, and 2 more small bedrooms. Dad built a long den across the back.

Anyway, it's still there... and the asking price is unbelievable. It is in a great location - right off Canal St with the streetcar lines still running and only about 10 minutes to downtown and the French Quarter. But still...

The house my dad built after that one was out by the lakefront... not on Lake Pontchartrain proper, but only a short bus ride down to it. In high school, my friend and I used to ride down there after school sometimes and do our home-work by the water. That house is no longer there. Katrina was the end of it. But I believe another was built on the same lot since then. 

I do miss being close to water. We had Lake Pontchartrain and the Mississiippi... and of course we had/have family who live in Waveland and Biloxi (only a short ride away) so we spent a lot of time on the Gulf coast in the summers. Good memories.

Hope I didn't bore you too much with my reminiscing...

I'm going to close this with 2 things; a new crochet weave pattern I'm trying  and an old Irish saying that I like.

This new blogger that was forced on me today is giving me fits...

(couldn't figure out how to make the crochet pic larger or how to add labels... oh well, at least I can insert this: 😝😡)

But thanks for visiting anyway. Hope you are having an easier time of it. Could be that I just don't need one more frustration these days.

Hugs (virtual),

Rian

a virtual walk through the woods...

This is me virtually walking through pristine wooded forest full of huge trees and giant fern...  Actually I'm walking around the circle that goes from my kitchen to my dining room to front room to game room and back to kitchen. I do it 10 times and then up and down the stairs about half a dozen times. That's my daily exercise since we can't walk outside. Think it's 101 F today... possibly 103 by this evening.

Next Tuesday we will be in September. Hard to believe that this pandemic has gone on this long and may go on even longer. Even harder to believe is that some still aren't convinced of it's danger. I guess the only way they will be convinced is if and when it hits home with someone they love.  

My oldest son told me back in the early days of the virus that it wasn't a matter of 'if but when'. I've thought of this a lot.  And lately it's gotten closer... our SIL (83) was in the hospital with Covid, and both my grandson (21)  and grand daughter (18) have young friends that have tested positive. Not 'if but when'...

And the sad thing is that we know so little about the virus. The young ones may not have to be hospitalized, but there are studies showing dangerous long term effects of the virus on the body of both the young and the old. Our 2 DIL's  are nurses and work with Covid patients - so we hear a lot. But if you google 'after effects of Covid 19', you can read how even after recovery there can be devastating long term effects.

And with the schools and colleges opening... well, the spread is not going to be contained.

November is fast approaching. God help us. This year I'm not looking forward to either Thanksgiving nor Christmas... all because we have to endure the 2020 Election first. And no matter how it turns out, there will be chaos. How did we get to this??  

Well, I had no idea what I was going to write about when I started this post...  possibly laugh a bit at my walking through the virtual forest... but I ended up talking about Covid again. Sorry.

Those of you that can get out and enjoy nature, please do it and share it with the rest of us... through pics and posts. Those of you that are able to take car trips to the beach, etc. and continue to maintain social distancing, etc., please continue to share. 

One thing I would like to address here is how important it is not to have personal beliefs referring to either Covid or Politics disrupt your family. Don't go there if it's a hot spot... which it can be to some. Almost all of us have family members who don't share the same beliefs. Agree to disagree. I personally believe that most of us want the same things, but just don't agree on how to get there.

Enough. It's Friday! Happy TGIF! Even though every day seems the same, I still look forward to the weekends - habit I guess. 

I thank God that no family nor friends (neither in Texas nor Louisiana) were affected too badly by Hurricane Laura. And I pray for those whose homes were in the path of that storm...  

Hugs,
Rian

just random thoughts...

Sometimes I think we're living through a Steven Spielberg novel. Some day (if we survive this pandemic, if there aren't other waves, if this is not the beginning of the end), someone will (if not doing so already) write a novel called "2020".  How it will play out is still up in the air. 

I know most of our minds are sashaying back and forth between dwelling on this unprecedented happening as well as not wanting to think, write, or talk about it anymore. 

Well, I happen to run out of books to read last night and picked up one out of a box that used to belong to  my oldest grand daughter. It's called "The Fifth Wave" - an apocalyptic novel to be sure written by Rick Yancey. 

An excerp from the back:

"After the first wave, only darkness remains. After the 2nd wave, only the lucky escape. And after the 3rd wave, only the unlucky survive. After the 4th wave, only one rule applies: Trust no one." 

OK... definitely not one of my 'feel good' reads. But as I started it out of desperation to read something it did a fairly good job of 'grabbing' me. It seems to be written from the prospective of a young girl trying to survive... and it gives her thoughts (which are kind of funny and very human).

An example: as she's slipping through the gas station at dusk in search of supplies and water...

"Why people grabbed the beer and soda, the cash from the registers, and safe, the rolls of lottery tickets, but left two pallets of drinking water was beyond me. What were they thinking? It's an alien apocalypse! Quick, grab the beer?"

Sound vaguely familiar? "It's a global pandemic! Quick, grab the TP!"

Anyway, I didn't get too far into it before I fell asleep. But it did make me think. 

Concerning this pandemic, there seems to a few possible outcomes:

1. This will eventually end and all will return to normal.
2. This will eventually end and all will not return to normal.
3. This will not end, and new waves will continue to come.
4. This will not end, but we will. 

(I tend to go for the 2nd possibility - but perhaps that's only 'hope' springing eternal)

Forgive me if I ventured into territory most of you are trying to avoid this  morning. It was just all on my mind and I tend to have to get it out.

Our oldest grand daughter just moved into the dorms at college... and it's weighing heavy on my mind. I worry about her safety - heath-wise and otherwise. But for the moment, she is happy. I guess that's a good thing. And she has her masks, knows the dangers, etc. 

Here is a pic she sent:

I hope and pray that the colleges stay virus-free, but it seems almost unavoidable. I am afraid that they will open (as safe as they can make it), then become contaminated due to off campus parties or just young negligence, and then close again. But we are in unprecedented times, we can only hope for the best...

Happy Saturday to all of you. Please don't let my post depress you. I'm determined to make the most of each day that I'm given... if only by writing a few lines, making a few more masks, cooking something wonderful for DH, or even catching another hammerhead shark (on Animal Crossing game!). Stay well and stay safe!

Hugs,
Rian



...and just a simple question concerning the disappearance of lysol spray from the face of the earth... shouldn't the company be making tons of it since the consumer demand is such? And if they are, where is it going? Certainly not to the shelves of stores (or not any stores we know).  If you try to order it online, it always says 'out of stock'.  Just another unanswered question.

Living virtually...

Sorry I haven't posted in a while. Laptop was in the shop. 

I'm going to share with you how I've been living virtually through the magic of technology.  And believe me, in this day and times - living virtually is the way to go.  Reality at the moment is not much fun. 

Nintendo Switch "Animal Crossing"

my avatar and her wardrobe

Yes, I've got an avatar.  Next is a picture of her in her garden - (something I can't actually have here due to the shade in our back by the creek and the wildlife in the front and back). But in my virtual reality I can garden as much as I want, water my plants, grow flowers, plants, and trees, etc.  I can even share my flowers and fruit with neighbors. We get apples, pears, and coconuts on the island.

beach front property

I can also swim in the ocean (since I don't swim in real life - I love this!), walk the beach at night, fish, catch butterflies, take trips to other islands, play games with other residents, watch the fireworks at night, etc.  

And Joanne, I can also weave! Just got myself a working loom (not saying it's anything like the real thing,  but still the closest I'll ever come to weaving - it works too). The neat thing is that all of these things work. The lamps light, the sewing machine sews, the loom weaves, the espresso machine makes coffee, etc. 

Normally I'm not a gamer. Don't even play cards - and until this was given to me by my grandson (who is an active gamer), I would never have even considered it.  

And for those of you who don't want to play with strangers online, let me tell you that you don't have to do this. I only play with the computer AI's (or whatever they're called) but you can set it up to play just with the specific friend or friends you want (no one else) - and if you do this, you can visit each other on their personal islands. This could be fun?

Anyway, this is how I've spent the week (without my laptop). Oh, I also did some cooking (made meatballs and spaghetti, and sour cream hatch pepper chicken enchiladas - enough to eat some and freeze some). And finally received the yarn I'd ordered - so started on a blue and white crochet afghan... 

That's been my week... nothing exciting, but OK. The feral kittens are adorable . The 5 of them keep us entertained as they tumble and play with each other.  So far they have stayed close to here - although we know eventually they will wander off. We will miss them.

Hope I didn't bore you overmuch with this game, and perhaps it's my age showing, but I'm impressed with the details and motion involved. I've never played anything like this and find it fascinating.

Anyhow thanks for reading. Please stay well and stay safe. 

Hugs,
Rian