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Monday, October 3, 2022

I'm old... I admit it



Things that remind me that I'm old.... there ARE some. Recently DH and I were standing inside a restaurant waiting for a lunch table (and yes! we are finally doing that again... of course we want a booth and not a table, but still it's progress).

Anyway, there was a bench with about 4 people sitting on it and we were only standing there for about 5 minutes when the young couple on the bench stood up and offered it to us. I said, "oh no, that's OK...", but they insisted so I sat. DH didn't. I think he didn't want to look like he needed it. But I felt like I should take it because it was so polite of them to offer. It's a bittersweet feeling... a combination of 'so nice of them to offer' and 'just how old do I look?'

This was just a recent occurrence. I'm sure I could think of others if I put my mind to it. It's not that I don't think I look old... I do. But it's these little reminders that give you a 'heads up'.  

Another is the constant questioning by the medical staff of whether I'm afraid of falling?  It's such a weird question to me. Who isn't afraid of falling? But do I worry about it? No... so far that hasn't been my problem (yet).  I know it is for lots of folks my age... my very good friend is very afraid of falling... and uses a cane or a walker. But again, the question is aimed at old people and they definitely ask me. (Another friend in N.O. who is approaching 80 once told me that a doctor asked her if she 'leaked'? Her answer was "No, I've not had that pleasure yet.")

Then there's the neighbors (good hearted as they are and appreciated) that came by during the pandemic asking if we were alright and did we need them to grocery shop for us. Very appreciated and kind of them, but non-the-less another reminder of our age. 

How about the one done probably unintentionally, but still a bit  demeaning when a man calls me (definitely many years his senior) "young lady". I find this uncomfortable... just an unnecessary  subtle reminder of age.




And lastly when I recently went shopping for an update on my iPhone 6 (which is no longer supported by Apple, won't download some apps, and has to be charged fairly often as it doesn't keep the charge). The young man told and showed me all the available phones - from iPhone 14 (Pro's, Max's, etc.) to the lowly iPhone 11's (which weren't available on display). They all looked alike to me... except some were bigger... and some had more color options .  

He seemed to know that I just wanted a phone that worked to transfer all my info on - especially appointments and reminders. (I do use my phone for everything - except talking - don't talk on the phone much) and that probably this will be my last update. He also seemed to know that I wasn't interested in all the bells and whistles.... like an extra fancy camera and/or beaucoup memory.  Anyway, he recommended the iPhone SE (which is a form of the iPhone 13, but it kept the home button) and that's what I got. So,  was he catering to an old woman? Maybe. But he did it well.

Anyway, I was thinking about this today and decided that I'd share my thoughts. I'll bet many of you have similar experiences that have made you feel your age. Actually, my youngest granddaughter (9) gave me another one just yesterday. She was busy putting You Tube on my new phone - and I asked her if I really needed You Tube on my phone. She answered very matter-of- factly "Of course you do, Grandma".  That showed me!


granddaughter

  

Hugs (virtual),

Rian



26 comments:

  1. There are many standard questions at doc offices and hospitals. Research shows that people afraid of falling, actually DO fall more often. I do all of the fall prevention stuff, like taping thin rugs down and not getting on a ladder for ceiling light bulb changes. Most of my fear is rational since I've seen the results as an RN with hospital patients. Since our bone structure gets thinner as we age, like removing pieces of scaffolding from an outdoor renovation project, we really do fall more easily. Many folks think they fell, and then broke their hip. A lot of times it is because the bone broke, then causing the fall. Linda in Kansas

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    1. I do realize they must ask these questions and why... just happens to be another reminder.

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  2. The man calling me young lady when I was definitely his senior would infuriate them.
    I see enough signs of my age - and AM careful (but not obsessive) about falling.
    And no, I don't need Youtube on my phone.

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    1. I know EC, I probably don't need You Tube on my phone either... but that's OK.

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  3. Rian, this was a funny, good read. Just last night my neighbor Opal was visiting, she wanted to see my new chair. She saw my indoor antenna (a big white square) and asked me how I could live without cable, I said easy as I streamed everything. She said "I don't get the popularity of that, you younger people make me feel old!" Not 1/2 hour later, her daughter Jess knocked on my door to get her mom, said "I saw those pictures you sent my mom, so you finally learned how to use your phone" and I said "No, I still use my digital camera" and she rolled her eyes and I suddenly felt old. It all depends who you're talking to! :^)

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    1. Your neighbor's name is Opal? Funny... I only know one Opal and she's the 80 year old I mentioned in N.O. And you are right, it all depends on the situation and who you are talking to.
      I also have a Nikon digital camera (with all the Zoom lenses, etc.) But since iPhones have cameras, I have to admit, I don't use my Nikon much anymore... except maybe to get a good shot of a critter in my yard with the zoom. The iPhone is just too convenient.

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  4. Some of the things you mentioned, like helpful neighbors, I almost consider perks of being older but like you I do bristle when someone calls me "Young Lady."

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    1. Helpful neighbors are perks, Patti. I just mentioned them as another thing that makes me realize we're at that age where others realize we might need help (and possibly do).

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  5. My daughters cannot believe I use my PC more than my phone. And yes, they get the answer faster and wave the phone in my face, but I cannot read the answer that is plain and simple on the pc in front of my fac.

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    1. I know, Joanne. I do google things on my phone a lot... but find that I can't do some things like play games with my granddaughter on the phone as it's too small to see things well.

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  6. I am seeing my doctor today for my annual wellness visit. I had to fill out a long form, which I do every year. And yes, I know about "leaking" and am grateful for bladder leakage pads. :-)

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    1. Good luck with the wellness check today, DJan!!

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  7. That last meme hits home, lol!
    It's all perspective, when I was young, 30 was old. Now that I'm 63, you have to be at least 80-85 for me to consider you old. If some man called me young lady, my response would something along the lines of, hey junior I think you're due for an eyesight exam.
    My dad always said, getting old ain't for sissies - he lived to 98 so I expect he knew what he was talking about. :)

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    1. No, Mae... it isn't for sissies. I once had an old man tell me (when I was in my 20's and he was trying to sign a form with a shaky hand) "Don't ever get old. It's the pits!" And I remember thinking, "the alternative isn't too good either..."

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  8. before i forget to say it, your granddaughter is a stunner, what a beauty. as for the rest of this post, it really made me chuckle. i recently had a birthday, i am 64, 64...when in my life did i not think 64 was old, older than dirt!!! i had a really nice "young" man recently at the apple store, he looked like he was "10" but boy did he know his stuff. funny meme's...the last one really spoke to me!!

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    1. Yes, I no longer consider 64 old, Debbie... since I'm approaching the 80 mark. And I too see service people and even doctors that look like teenagers.

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  9. I recently heard a radio announcement about some celebrities birthday -- number 75 and she was born in 1947. I thought oh, no that can't be right. I was born in 1948 and I'm only . . . Whoops!

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  10. It seems to me that the years between 30 and 60 sped by VERY quickly.

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    1. I think so too, Linda... and the older you get, the faster they spin by.

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  11. Relatable. While driving, I often grumble at the "old guys going to slow" and then my wife points out that we might be the same age. Sigh.

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    1. Yes... it sometimes takes someone to say something or something to happen to realize that we've actually reached that unfathomable place called 'old age'.

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  12. The one factor I appreciate is when I've been shopping and have a case or two of bottled water...I appreciate offers of helping me load it into the trunk!!

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    1. There are lots of times when the old age card is appreciated... that's a fact.

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  13. That's me scrolling down down down on the drop down menu. In Hawaii, people tend to call everybody their uncle or auntie. However, one cashier who looked to be middle aged called me "Mama" and I almost laughed. And then there was that time a child saw me and asked her mother, "Where is grandma going?" I do like the auntie and uncle thing in Hawaii.

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    1. Yes, I would like that 'auntie' thing too. In the south we children always called other adults 'Miss Angie' or 'Miss Janet'...

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