Some of you suggested that my melancholy could be due to SAD (seasonal affective disorder). I thought I'd heard of this but googled it just the same. It says that SAD is a mood disorder that is characterized by depression and occurs at the same time each year... usually Fall or Winter.
Apparently it's common... more so in areas where there is no sun.
But Texas has lots of sun!
However, I read that it could also be caused by the body producing less serotonin (for whatever reason) or possibly seasonal changes causing a drop in the production of melatonin.
Who knows the reason? - but the symptoms seem pretty obvious: oversleeping, no interest in activities, tiredness, easily agitated, social withdrawal...
Yes to all of the above!
Maybe the back pain and shingles added to the change of seasons upped my anxiety level and brought this on???
All I know is that I don't like it! It's not me!!
Give in to it - stay home and lay low for awhile? Or get more active, start some new projects (maybe a new quilt for someone? more cheeky chickens?)
My instinct says not to give in to it... although I want to. Almost called in and dropped my pottery classes. May still do that.
Thursday: Decided to make myself go to class... and also to go with the girls to lunch (which I hardly ever do - since I don't eat lunch just drink my thermos of hot tea). But I did all this and found that I DID feel a bit better for it.
However, my agitation was just below the surface as when I couldn't get the top off of something at the studio, I had the urge to throw it across the room... (didn't though).
All in all, pushing through it turned out to be a good call.
Put my glazed turtle vase into the kiln. Also working on some little sea turtles to add to bowls, etc.
So... life goes on. Thanks to all of you who commented. I hadn't thought of SAD - and whether it is or isn't, it did get me to do something about how I felt.
Hugs,
Rian
I know exactly how you feel. I feel the same way. I put mine down to my dislike of growing old and my inability to accept that I am 73, plus of course Tom is constantly on my mind and the fact that I may lose him. I also think that I have no need to make anything, I've done this and I've done that and do I really need another quilt or do I really need to do another embroidery. All this goes through my mind and puts me off doing anything.
ReplyDeleteBut, I've got out the crochet hook and started making Mandalas and am enjoying it. I have no real purpose at the moment but I keep telling myself that it's good therapy, and it is.
So, just keep going, it's a shame when you have such talents to just stop doing things.
The little Turtle is just beautiful.
Briony
x
Thanks, Briony. This feeling is new to me... not that I haven't been a bit melancholy before, but not to this extent. I can't imagine how you must feel with Tom's health problems. But you are right, if we just keep doing the things that make us happy (or used to), eventually we may/will spring back again. (Your mandalas are beautiful too.)
DeleteI'm glad to hear you're a bit better, and that you are allowing yourself both to enjoy some social interaction and that you are doing some pottery. Everyone has down periods, and I'm sending you all my happiest thoughts and prayers for a quick recovery. I do so look forward to your posts, whether you are melancholy or not. Truth. :-)
ReplyDeleteThanks, DJan. I so look forward to your comments... and to reading your blog. I think your happy thoughts and prayers are working as things seem to be brightening up.
DeleteLove your turtle. I vote for fighting on through, though a nap or two sneaks in, pretty often.
ReplyDeleteYes, Joanne, I think fighting on through works well... and you should know. And yes, a nap or two doesn't hurt either.
DeleteYou may have hit the nail on the head, when mentioning your recent back pain and shingles. Going through pain and being physically vulnerable can really affect your mood. It is easy to just shut down and hide away, so good for you going out and doing something anyway! -Jenn
ReplyDeleteJenn, when I think of all the people who live with health problems, I feel bad about letting my 'inconveniences' get me down. It's such an awful feeling - and couldn't see how shutting down was going to help - so yes, I think going out and getting active again definitely helped.
DeleteI hope you're feeling better today. Like Jenn said, having back pain and then shingles is enough to make you feel down. I've never had shingles but know how awful back pain can make you feel. You are so talented! Your little animals look absolutely real. The little turtle is adorable.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Henny. Everyone's comments made me feel like I made the right decision. It also gave me more empathy for people who have depression. It's a scary feeling...
DeleteAs for the little sea turtle. He was supposed to go on a larger bowl or vase, but with me missing so many classes lately, he is now too dry to attach. Guess he will be a stand alone paperweight.
Sounds like you have a workable plan. Pain can really knock us off our pins and make us want to pull our heads in and just turtle. Cute turtle by the way. Interaction with others is usually the cure for me as they pull me out of me. Sending good thoughts and hope the blue fog is lifting.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Patti. Yes the blue fog is lifting. Hope it stays away!
DeleteGood for you! I'm sure it wasn't easy to get up and go, but you did.
ReplyDeleteLove the turtle!
Thanks, Mae.
DeleteOh, believe you me, I understand. I went through that during the summer. Maybe it was that the heat was just too much to get out in... but I quit going to church, I stopped doing activities here at the apartments, I just wanted to sit... And, I was sad, unmotivated. It's awful. So, i am glad you worked through that. The little turtle is so cute. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Latane. It was an awful feeling. But good to know that it passes.
DeleteI have suffered from SAD and I usually get that in August and March although it has diminished over the past few years. I have been doing meditation and it has helped me. Your symptoms do sound familiar, but whatever it is, I hope you find something that works for you. I am sure getting out and doing things is far better than giving in to an urge to stay in bed with covers drawn over the head. Good luck and good health!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Olga. I am better. It seems to have passed... whatever it was.
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