
The dream is
starting to fade…
You may
think me mad… or weird or whatever… doesn’t matter. What matters is that
I don’t forget. My eyes are tearing over the prospect that I might
forget.
*********
The Dream
I was in
Ireland (I think). Could have been anywhere… maybe Maine… but it felt
like the Ireland of my dreams. I was wandering around fairly
pointlessly, milling with people that didn’t ‘see it’… and thus, neither did
I. I was walking up and down the old
streets haphazardly looking for something… and not knowing what.
As I passed
an old wharf… like so many you see around Ireland and England (most are not
pretty and picturesque like you imagine, but dirty and dingy looking). But
this one looked fascinating… as there in the harbor were huge rock boulders in
the water… and then part of an even older wharf… and then the sea. It had things
in the harbor area that had rusted and just been left… old abandoned boats
and what looked like a huge rusted slide… and there was junk all around.
A girl
appeared… at least I think it was a girl. She/He was odd looking, kind of strange with
lots of long dark ratty hair… and an old floppy coat. As she passed me, she was
talking to herself out loud and said that she might find those things here…
meaning rocks on the muddy beach??? I don’t know what she meant, but I knew she
was right… and that she belonged here.
I followed…
with much joy (and found even more). She leaped from the boulders across
the slushy muddy beach and bog, as well as the water that lay between us and
just made it to the wharf’s edge. There were a few old folks watching. I looked
at the expanse and thought out loud, ‘I don’t have that much jump in
me’.
Later, I found
myself on the older wharf looking into the deep churning sea and up at the
sky and knew this was what I was looking for. This was it… a
sense of adventure and freedom… and inexplicable wonder bubbled up inside me
and no matter how hard I try, I can’t describe it adequately. I can only thank
God for allowing me to remember it (yes, I had a similar experience
years ago, but the memory has faded).
Now I was on
top of the giant rusted slide looking at my friend on the wharf and mirroring
in her eyes this shared joy. As I looked around me, so many things on the town-side
looked shabby, all but an old painted green building which seemed to glow
with charm. I asked her where she lived and she pointed there… and I
knew it… even as she pointed.
Then, as I
thought of swimming in the sea, I somehow lost hold of the joy… let ‘fear’ creep
in, and the weird island in the water now moved slightly and I saw millions of
tiny pink tentacles in the water… and I was afraid. When our eyes met,
she saw the ‘fear’ and the thought that ‘I’d been betrayed’ in mine. Then, I saw
the ‘No! Stay with me!’ in hers.
I chose
to trust… and jumped in! Immediately I knew that it was alright. The tentacles
(if they existed at all) only helped to lift me and I found myself back
on the wharf with my new friend. She/He
was beaming. We headed towards the green building. Her/His mom(?) was there… so
very happy to see me and I could feel how proud she was that her child had
found someone to share the joy.
And I did.
She/He was not a wild child… but perhaps an angel??... sent to remind me
that the something I’m looking for is still there. It’s real. We
just lose sight of it in our every day lives. But it does exist… and we mustn’t
ever stop looking or be afraid ‘to see’.
Well, that’s
it. When I went to bed that particular night, I hadn't felt so hot. The areas behind my nose and throat were burning… and I figured that either I was coming
down with something or having a sudden allergy attack. I gargled, took a Tylenol, and crept into
bed. When I awoke the next morning, my throat still felt a bit scratchy, but
I lay there keeping my eyes closed trying to hold on to the feeling and
remnants of the dream. I knew it would fade as the day progressed… so finally
pulled myself up to sit and record it.
I know this
is a weird one. But I’m sharing it just the same as it was an important one (to
me). I don’t know if our dreams are there to teach us, to remind us, to comfort,
or if they’re simply a hodge-podge of stuff in our memories (maybe all of
the above). But personally, I think there’s more to them than we know… and
if anyone knows of any research being done (and there must be), I’d love
to read about it. If so, leave a message in your comment or email me.
Thanks for reading
Hugs (virtual),
Rian