It's 4 AM and I'm having one of those 'dark night of the soul' episodes. Well, perhaps that's an exaggeration. But you know those nights when you wake up at 3 AM... and your mind is filled with thoughts that you consciously avoid during your waking hours... worries about your children, your grandchildren, friends, your friends' children, finances, health, climate control, the state of the world, the state of the nation... as well as old age and dying.
I personally think these pop up because they are things that for the most part, we have little or no control over. During the day our conscious mind is aware of this and push these thoughts aside, but at night when our guard is down, these worries resurface.
When there's no answer or solution, I tend to 'give it to God' (as the expression goes), have a cup of tea, and eventually go back to bed.
But I have found that humor helps... if I can laugh at myself. For instance - I've seen that ambulance, fire truck, etc. show up in the middle of the night (for neighbors as well as for my own mother)... and I wonder if and when it will one day come for me. I'm sure other 'older folk' must think about this too. However, my first thought before this band of strangers come charging into my house would be... 'are there dishes in the sink?"
Oh well... it is what it is right? (and we CAN handle it!)
Thanks for reading. Have a good Sunday (and don't leave any dishes in the sink!)
ha ha ... I find I can sleep well, as long as I don't leave any dirty dishes in the sink (both literally and figuratively).
ReplyDeleteI can see how that would be true, Tom.
DeleteFor several months after I came home from the rehab hospitals I made sure the doors were unlocked at bedtime. Front and back, because who know which one the EMT's would pick (!) and I didn't want them broken open and needing repair.
ReplyDeleteNot sure I'd worry about the door... after 34 years, we could use a new front door.
DeleteI wrote about the importance of humor in getting through my days, too. I use a THC/CBD tincture that helps me sleep, but I also wake up around 3 now and then and think about things like this. It's just what comes with the territory, methinks. :-)
ReplyDeleteYes, it does come with the territory. We just have to work out ways to handle it... and if we can do it with humor, all the better.
DeleteI must be an eternal optimist because I never once thought that an ambulance might come for me one day -- and this after an ambulance and crew literally picked me up off the street after a bike accident. So now it occurs to me that ,living alone, perhaps I should start considering this a bit more seriously.
ReplyDeleteIt is a possibility, Olga. But I wouldn't give it too much thought... unless dishes in the sink bother you.
DeleteLiving alone, I have a lot of those worries all the time! I don't worry about dishes in the sink, but hilariously, I fret about unshaved legs, as if that would be of utmost embarrassment were I in a dire situation. :-P
ReplyDeleteIsn't it strange... the things that would bother or embarrass us? Truth be told, I'm sure the EMT's have seen a lot worse.
DeleteI had the same last night. Slept for a few hours and then could not turn off my mind until 5 when I went back to bed.
ReplyDeleteHuh... maybe it was a full moon?
Deletejust when I am getting some long awaited sleep our cat wakes me up, I get up and then he takes a nap, go figure, maybe I have sleep apnea and he's saving my life, what do I know. I don't have time to worry about appearance, house is a disaster with dust and cat toys, so what, there are more pressing issues to deal with. I worry about dh and my health, constant money issues to cover rising food, fuel, insurance, taxes, and healthcare, bills. What wears on my psyche even more is the state of society throughout the globe, dispensing of cultural and societal norms (lack of a moral compass, lack of human decency, and lack of free speech for conservatives and biased free speech). All that coupled with corrupt politics, fake news, complete social media biases, censorship and monopolies. I have no control over any of it even with a vote. I quit watching the negative news; thankfully our President was exonerated, and still they keep on; sick of all the corrupt do nothing politicians who seem to get rich on a meager (to them) salary. I am now thinking of Eddy Arnold and the song "Make the World Go Away"
ReplyDeleteWell, apparently from the comments, there are a lot of us out there waking up at 3am for vairous reasons. I guess as DJan said, it comes with the territory.
DeleteI was awake at 3:00 am on the dot this morning. But this morning instead of lying awake wondering what my funeral will be like, I repaired the dirt road in front of our house, pot holes and all, using a rake and a shovel, over and over and over. I am going out some time this morning to see if my plan to fix the road works. You write the best posts!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your pot holes! I once saw a picture that was posted where there were so many potholes on the street/road that someone started filling them with dirt and planting flowers in them.
DeleteOh yes, I often have that late night date. Often if I read a while I will go back to sleep.
ReplyDeleteFunny about the dishes. My main concern is that the EMT's would let my dog out to get me. They would have opened the gate and she could easily be run over. I don't worry about the cat for the ruckus would have her hiding under the bed for hours.
True, cats don't tend to run out... just run and hide. I've often thought that they weren't very good protection (like a dog might be), but they are a great alarm system as when someone comes to the door, they all scatter like the wind.
DeleteI like to read your post...hope, everything goes well with you and yours.
ReplyDeletehave a great day
Thanks for visiting, Tanza.
DeleteI've been awake early the last two nights but that's because of the time change from Florida to Saskatchewan. But I do have the odd night when I wake worrying about the things I try to put aside during the day. I usually try to get back to sleep, but have been known to write a few things down. It seems by this action I can release the thoughts and get back to sleep.
ReplyDeleteWriting things down helps get thoughts out of my head also.
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