Here's something I've thought about a lot... and wondered about. It's something that I may be lacking, but don't know how essential it might be... to making a person respectable or worthy. I know in the sports profession (as well as many others, it's a necessity).
I guess what I'm trying to say is that for whatever reason, I don't have a 'competitive bone' in my body. From childhood into adult hood, I've never wanted to 'compete'... not that I didn't enjoy doing my own thing, or helping someone do theirs, but never wanted to 'be the best' or 'win the race' so to speak. That sounds so 'uninspiring', doesn't it?
Even writing my books or doing my pottery, it's nice if others enjoy them, but don't want or need a Best Seller, don't want the spotlight for any reason. That sounds pathetic, doesn't it? But it's true. I like my life and feel it's good. I've created the atmosphere I enjoy, and have surrounded myself with family and friends... not a lot, but enough.
However, when you come to our age, you begin to think perhaps I could have done more? I could have honed my creativity to a higher level, I could have tried for more recognition in my field of study or other? But I didn't want recognition or power... just love and peace and a happy home.
I know that people who are competitive get further in life. They work hard and fight for their place in the world. They may struggle, but usually get to their goals, and become rich and sometimes powerful.
I'm going to guess that it takes all kinds... the ambitious and those not so much (am I a muggle? - NO! I really like the idea of magic).
My older sister was an Architect. She once told me that I was much too 'comfortable' with life. Maybe she was right.
Anyway, this has been on my mind recently, so I just thought I'd put it out there.
Enjoy your Sunday! And again thanks for letting me share...
Hugs (virtual),
Rian
Being competitive is perhaps more genetic than we realize. I have a teeny competitive gene, but it's actually small and manageable. My husband believes competition is evil and leads people to create unhealthy acts against themselves and others. I think you are simply perfect!
ReplyDeleteAnd you are sweet. I'm not sure that competition is evil... but it certainly can cause problems. However, I can see its good side too. Maybe like so many things, too much (or too little) of a good thing can be bad.
DeleteWell, like you say everyone is different. I think that being comfortable at peace with yourself is a wonderful way to be. Too often really competitive people push beyond their reach and end up unhappy that they haven't achieved what they consider their best effort. Or worse yet step all over others to get to their goal. And just think what an awful world it would be if EVERYONE was competitive------the world would be a crazy, unpleasant place. We need people who are comfortable in their own skin to even things out and create some space for contentment.
ReplyDeleteI like your explanation, Victoria... 'some who create some space for contentment'
DeleteNothing wrong with being comfortable with life!!! I would think that should be everyone's goal! Hope you are feeling better.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Miss Merry. I am feeling better... just a bit philosophical.
DeleteComfort, love and laughter sound just about perfect to me. My competitive urge is small - and I am grateful for that. I like to think that what I do I do well, but I have no urge to be 'best'. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteWell, that makes 2 of us anyway... ; )
DeleteI sort of feel sorry for people who thrive on competition and power. There will come a time in their lives when they will no longer be the best or the most powerful. The world will move on and they will no longer be relevant in a way that matters. I suspect for these people, just knowing you were once ultra successful will not suffice.
ReplyDeleteWouldn't 'have been the best at one time' be enough? It is an accomplishment...
DeleteMaybe for some, but others who thrive/crave power or being at the top have a hard time when it goes away. (Like has-been entertainers and politicians with outsize egos, for example.)
DeleteI do have some competitive edges and they are the very pieces I find most unlikeable in myself and in others. I try to be aware and address them with compassion.
ReplyDelete'competitive edges'... a term I'm not sure about, but think I understand.
DeleteI'm with Bobi, I wanted to be successful in my career but I never felt the need to be in charge of others or better than other Developers in my computer group. I just wanted to be the best me! Rian, I think you are terrific Just the Way You Are! 😊
ReplyDeleteI like that, Dug... "the best me" (that kind of works)
DeleteMy sister was non competitive for a long time. Then she began quilting professionally, and now is happy to outperform and collect more prizes than many of the rest of them. Except, she wholeheartedly supports the quilters who are talented.
ReplyDeleteInteresting, Joanne. I more or less thought you were born competitive... but maybe it's something you can also develop over time?
DeleteI think there are areas of my life where I was definitely more competitive than others. For example, at my most recent workplace I strived to attain higher levels. But mostly that was for the income and not the job itself (which probably was why I wasn't always successful).
ReplyDeleteBut much of my competitive streak came out when someone said when asked about my ability "her, she's just a ...." It's one of the reasons I went to university in my 30's. Someone said I couldn't do it. I did, while raising two children on my own, and was on the Dean's list more than once. That comment was made several times in various iterations throughout my career as well. My response was ususally, F you, watch me. :p
But in my personal life, I'd say I'm more like you. I'm comfortable with my family and friends and I've never wanted the biggest and best house or certain neighbourhood.
I guess when I look back on things, I did 'fight' to show that I could 'do the job' as well as the guys when I was in Animal Science. It was a man's field back then. But I didn't consider myself competing, just willing and... definitely able.
Deletewhat a great collection of thoughts!! i am super competitive when it comes to games at home, i want to win!! i think my family has made more of it then it really is, it has become a joke of sorts, "we better let mom win one"!! i was competitive in sports also, i always wanted to do well, get a trophy that i earned. BUT...i am not competitive with people, what they have, the house they live in, the car they drive...i could care less!! i got accepted to princeton universities nursing program, when i tell people, which is not often, they think "wow what an accomplishment"!! i didn't go, i selected a school that was affiliated with a teaching hospital!! i never thought princeton would be admired more!!
ReplyDeletei think you should be proud of whomever you are...we all should!!
I think the world of nurses... both my daughter-in-laws are nurses. I think I'm more impressed by them then by doctors. Somehow I feel that nurses give more out of compassion and doctors do it for the money (not all, I'm sure). As for the competitive gene, I guess I just missed it. It doesn't bother me, I just wonder about it sometime.
Deletehi sharon...the yellow flower is a marigold, it does have a more "delicate" shape!!
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